Chapter 2 -Symptoms

People say time is the biggest healer.. I say time heals wounds but scars are left to remind you, what you have been through....

For me loosing my father was not just about loosing a parent. Besides loosing a valuable relationship, i lost a friend. My father,  actually both my parents have given us, siblings the liberty to speak our mind. And say whatever we wanted to.

And,  we could tell our parents anything and everything.

Papa was always a very disciplined and an organized person. He did everything so neatly and perfectly that sometimes i wonder how did he. At times mom would forget about something, but papa was more perfect then  organized. He just knew everything( I think all children think about their parent the way i think).

With him gone, and doing all things by myself makes me feel how hectic it is to be a parent and that too a parent, which i could look forward too. Though its been 10months since papa left , it feel likes it was just yesterday when papa was here with us and doing what he was best at- taking care of his children. He was always there for us.

When the doctor told me, papa has stage 4 cancer, i could not believe my ears- did i  just hear cancer? Is it happening to me? Has time come for papa? Will papa leave in few months. And I said to myself, loud and clear - NO, NEVER. I will challenge and win!( If only i had known, what papa was going through)

I wanted to be alone, i went to the park and set with my tablet in my hand. I typed " Gall Bladder Cancer Symptoms".

The result was :-

• Loss of appetite.
• Losing weight without trying
• Abdominal bloating.
• Abdominal pain, particularly in the upper right portion of the abdomen.
• Itchiness.
• Fever.
• Nausea.
• Yellowing of the skin and whites of the eyes (jaundice)

Now, i could relate to papa's loss of appetite and weight, constant complaint of pain in the abdomen, he being tired. 

It was  Diwali ( 13Nov2012), and i wanted to buy this dining table, i asked my father to accompany me. Papa always loved shopping. It was difficult to match his enthusiasm. And i have inherited the same quality. This store had its dining furniture on 3rd floor. As papa started walking he began to shake, he could not climb and  refused to come upstairs. He waited downstairs. Something was wrong. Papa was moving away from us. And we had no idea.  Had i known it or had the slightest inclination of it being cancerous. May be papa would have been here with me.