Chapter 2 - Hospital

Papa was diagnosed with cancer in one of the so called best hospitals in Delhi. But since the hospital din’t have dedicated oncology department. So it was mandatory to shift him to some other hospital. Now the  major question was where to take papa for his further and specialized treatment. I had two options stay in Delhi and be there with papa or send papa to Mumbai, where my younger brother stays. 

I turned selfish and decided to find a hospital in Delhi itself .Besides papa wanted to be at  home and be with his “chutki beti”( his only grandchild and my daughter). 

Papa, was admitted to a Cancer hospital in Delhi.  The hospital staff was very good. I must say, during the entire treatment, i am more then happy with the junior staff. The staff was compassionate and dedicated. From ensuring personal hygiene to a dedicated nurse to look after papa.  Timely medicines to dressing the wounds, or just applying lotion on a swollen nerve. Everything was done in a very disciplined manner. Every morning the CEO, would just come without informing. And would listen to everyone and personally ask every patient or relatives about the hospital, doctors, or any other issue.

Papa, loved to dress up and was very conscious the way he looked. On 29the November 2012, the fateful day when we went to the hospital for the first time to consult the doctor regarding removal of gall stones. He woke up early. The first thing papa did after waking up was to shave( i have seen him doing since i was a baby). This routine continued till he himself was able to do it. And later on when he became bedridden, he would ask my elder brother to do it.

Papa, would never wear clothes without ironing ( he made ironing look as a form art)l. He was again dressed in his favorite neatly ironed cream colored shirt, brown trousers and well polished shoes . Looking at his preparation,  mom joked, you are not going to office  but to the hospital.

Mom tells us that papa was a great fan of Dev Anand ( the actor). Infact, when they got married. All his shirt had long collars. His style sense was so strong that it gave complex to many even today. 

The colors, he chose were very elite. His dressing style was way ahead of times. The suits he wore are still in fashion. In an earlier chapter i had mentioned, papa loved shopping. But after he came to know about cancer, he lost interest in life, colors and everything else. After that he never shopped. There was this mall next to this hospital. And since we had ample time after giving sample for blood tests and collecting report(s). I would often take papa to the mall.. Once when i insisted that he buys something for himself, he said “ now i don’t need it”.It was painful. And my fears have started taking shape- fear that papa has sensed his approaching “end”

In the next few months he grew weaker and weaker. He couldn’t walk and would just sit in the waiting area. But I never stopped telling him about the new SALE(s) going on and my shopping. He would see, listen , smile and then we would get up and  start walking  towards the report collection center. 

Miss you PAPA!

Chapter 1

Next few days, were spent in looking  for the right hospital and a good doctor.  On  7December 2012, i with all the reports visited this doctor. At the entrance gate, i couldn't control my tears. Hundreds of people from all over the world were scattered everywhere, from the garden area to waiting lounge, from the bill counter to cafeteria. The expression on their faces was not very difficult to read, some had those freckles which were born after bearing constant pain for a long time and some had this confused expression as of what to do next or where to go next? And my expression was why am i here?

I was very disappointed, but had no choice but to look for this doctor. He was the senior most doctor and at the billing counter( where file was made), I was informed there will be a long que. It was on third floor, I decided to take the stairs...thinking that may be by the time i reach , my stars would change and doctor will say that the report is incorrect. Anywas after waiting for 3hrs, I was called inside...and what the doctor said, I still remember..Your father, has got no time, only thing we can do is make his going away less painful!

Wiping my tears, I gathered myself and i asked, how many days papa has?

The doctor said, may be a month, and if he responds well to medication may be 6months and if god favors him, its 9months. Then he has to go.....

Exactly after 6 months, papa never got off from the bed. Cancer, what started form Gall bladder has moved to pancreas, liver, lungs and then to bones. His back bone was completely gone and papa became bedridden....

Initially he tried to sit with the help of a belt.But failed....he started getting bed sores..they were painful. Papa was in pain...and he started asking us to relieve him of pain. He wanted to die..a man so strong, heavy built, height of 5'8''....lay on the bed..helpless!

What is more painful!, ...I sitting next to papa unable to do anything for him...he was disintegrating every moment and asking for his death. What i said, Papa don't worry we will sail through...together

I had no words, inside i was dying myself..i started living in constant fear that what if he never woke up.  It was my routine for months, to call papa as soon as i woke up. At times i would record his voice. And one fine day, what seemed a perfect day, papa had juice after not eating for months, he smiled ...and i knew  it was time. He became a star- the brightest star - MY PAPA!